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Donna Kelley (Velazquez)

Dave, I am really sorry. I tried hard to find a tutorial for your boxer problem but no luck. 

Tim, I really appreciate all the publicity. Now that I have retired from interior design I needed something constructive to fill my free hours. Plus you wouldn't believe how well the sales for the Super-Underwear-Glue are going! Btw payment can be made in Euros or Dollars, but not Pesetas, Sorry, Joe. :-) Your commission check is now in the mail, Tim.

Jack, your tip on money laundering has been duly noted. 

I can't even imagine what new directions this conversation will now take!

Timothy Lavelle

Doc, I just came in from mowing that same section. You would want your slow-mo photography set up if you were filming me mow it now. I always recite "One small mow for old farts, one giant mow for old-fart-kind" as I begin down that hill. 

The three stooges type bathroom dance I described came about as a result of that damned hill. And to think I won a Twist contest once...

....i coulda been a contendah doc...

Donna, I'd like to congratulate you on a lifetime of teaching Spaniards how to use cement blocks and used aple crates and old boards to make bookcases and room dividers. Didn't I see you on the cover of the Spanish design magazine "Who Lives Like This"?

What I don't understand is why, with tapas readily available, you and Julio don't weigh in at 300 plus lbs? Cold beer and free bar food...we should all move there. 

David Barbour

Dear friends,

Toni Cardi is in Lewis Center in a nursing facility.  I don't think we are allowed to visit at this moment.

Mrs. Hog is the best source of info.

Donna Kelley (Velazquez)

Wrong show, Tim.  Mine was called "Property Hermanas" and we specialized in designs of the finest grade cardboard and plastic.

Re. the effects of the Pandemic Stress Tapas Eating don't look so bad when your bathroom scales are in kilos, not pounds.

Timothy Lavelle

M'donna,

Maybe you forgot that you sent me that unabridged cooy of your autobiography where, on page 53 you relate that you were turned down by the Dominican sisters for being...how did you put it....let me get to that page again.....yeah, yeah, found it..."I was turned down for being too statuesque".

Then you studied Spanish until, again, in your own words, "I forgot how tp speak English" requiring you to move to a country where statuesque and Spanish are both fluent.

Alright....alright...that's all the idiocy I can come up with at this moment. Donna is a favorite friend and if anyone ever thought otherwise they would have to be....you know....McLeod-ish or something as pathetic as that.

A favor. Please look up tonight and on nights to come and point a positive thought out into the universe for a very young someone who needs a universal hug from all of us now and in the near future. It's a real tough time for someone we all love. 

Donna Kelley (Velazquez)

Your imagination knows no limits, amigo Tim.

Re. the favor--Absolutely.

Michael McLeod

James Hamilton, M. D.

To all of our classmates who chose teaching as a career:

HAPPY TEACHER'S APPRECIATION WEEK!

You accepted a huge responsibility to teach the children well and right!

Jim

David Mitchell

Right on Jim,

I have two daughters and a daughter in law who taught. All in unique circumstances. My youngest taught handicapped children in a Montessory inside the Univesity of Cincinnati medical school. It was both a real Montesorri and a research project for the medical shcool and the school of education. She lovedd it but wages were poor and she got out. 

My oldest daughter taught in an inner-city Los Aangles school in a pretty rough neigbornodd - mostly low incone Hispanic - flanked on two sides by opposing gangs. She swore she would never want to teach. But she took a part time job where she fell in love with the kids and went into it full time for four years. Her kids grades climbed steadily, while her parrallel class grades (taught by a 27 year veteran teacher who hated her job - and resented Sara) grades stayed flat the entire four years as they progressed with their same group of kids. The L.A. School system politics drove her nuts and she quit. Parents cried at the last day oif school - begging her to stay. One mother parked her car behind Sara's car so she couldn't get out of the parking lot.

And my daughter-in-law teaches "special reading" (for deficient and problem readers) in Portland Oregon. She gets some wonderful testimonials from her former studetns. But this year she has had to teach remotely and it has stressed her out. In addition to having an 11 year-old son doing remote school at home, she teaches remotely. And she had to contact each set of parents once a week. She has 7 non-english speaking parents in the class - Russian, Ukranian, Spanish, Vietnamese, Urdu. Swahili, and something I think is called May May (never heard of it). I think she has to use the student to help translate for their parents.

AND I beleive Portland just cut their school budget this spast year.

WHY DO WE VALUE (and pay)  THE EARLY YEAR TEACHERS SO LITTLE?

John Jackson

I haven’t posted in a while but a recent post on the vaccine survey (post #27 out of 29) attempting to justify vaccine skepticism drove me up the wall.  This post lamented, among other things, that “the mRNA therapies were rushed to the public, skipping the stringent clinical trials and animal studies that have historically been demanded of pharmaceutical companies as a safeguard against adverse reactions”… The post also referenced an article https://www.distributednews.com/427233.html.

First of all, both the Moderna and Pfizer vaccines were each blind-tested initially on more than 40,000 people and judged to be 95% effective (that means they reduce the likelihood of contracting the virus by a factor of 20). They also virtually eliminated the likelihood of getting seriously ill.  Since the initial trials, more than 240 million doses have been administered in the U.S. without significant side effects. 

I also take issue with the article cited as backup, given the fact that another headline on the wacko website hosting the article was “Beware the financial FALLOUT from the vaccine bioweapons death wave... collapse of tax revenues, pensions, real estate values and the dollar all inevitable”.  In addition, the article cited no author so we have no way to judge his/her qualifications to render judgment on such a complex and technical issue relative, say, to the CDC and university vaccinologists and epidemiologists who have devoted their working lives to studying these issues and have overwhelmingly endorsed the safety and efficacy of the vaccines.

Jim, as I recall, you’ve gotten both your shots – would you care to give us your informed medical evaluation of this post?

Joseph D. McCarthy

Mr. McLeod since it was my brother Mike who forwarded the following Church Bulletins I thought it only appropriate to obtain your analysis.

  1.  The Fasting & Prayer Conference includes meals.

  2. Scouts are saving aluminum cans, bottles and other items to be recycled.  Proceeds will be used to cripple children.

  3. The sermon this morning: "Jesus Walks on the Water".  The sermon tonight: "Searching for Jesus".

  4.  Ladies, don't forget the rummage sale.  It's a chance to get rid of those things not worth keeping around the house.   Bring your husbands.

  5.  Don't let worry kill you off - let the Church help.

  6.  Miss Charlene Mason sang "I wll not pass this way again," giving obvious pleasure to the congregation.

  7.  For those of you who have children and don't know it, we have a nursery downstairs.

  8.  Next Thursday there will be tryouts for the choir.  They need all the help they can get.

  9.  Irving Benson and Jessie Carter were married on October 24th in the church.  So ends a friendship that began in their school days.

10.  A bean supper will be held on Tuesday evening in the church hall.  Music wil follow.....

11.  At the evening service tonight, the sermon topic will be "What is Hell?"  Come early and listen to our choir practice.

I'll save the rest till later.

Joe

Michael McLeod

Better than anything I could have written, Joe.

Michael McLeod

So is this Garrison Keillor column about spring:

https://www.garrisonkeillor.com/

And so is this Leonard Cohen lyric that was in my head and gave me a smile when I woke up this morning:

They oughta give my heart a medal

For lettin' go of you

When I turned my back on the devil

Turned my back on the angel, too.

Cohen spent several years in a Buddhist monastery, where he obviously learned how to make peace with life's contradictions.

Oh, and finally, since we're talking teacher appreciation: my fabulous significant other, an angel in her own right, turned the corner this month - May is going to be mostly testing for the first, second and third graders in her charge, so it will be a relatively easy month for her after the arduous, crazy months of trying to keep her students - and their parents - in line and on line as a dedicated Montesorri teacher. She is so dedicated she runs herself ragged even under the best of circumstances, and it was eating away at her, the challenge of having her legs taken out from her - montessori is the ultimate hands-on, face-to-face educational approach and she was constantly wrestling with transmitting the spirit of that on line. My task was to listen and sympathize every evening after her 14-hour days were over. Plus she spent hundreds to turn her house into a teaching studio for which she won't be fully reimbursed, thanks to recent tax changes (yes, by the previous administration).

Hated seeing her so stressed and disrespected. Grateful it's nearly over. 

Finally - and this time I mean really finally - thanks for weighing in on the anti vax misinformation, JJ. Sheesh. What a year.

Daniel Cody

Thanks Joe I needed a good spit coffee out of my nose laugh!

John Jackson

I'll second what Dan just said.

Mark Schweickart

Let me third the motion!

David Mitchell

Oh golly Joe,

I thought they were serious.

James Hamilton, M. D.

May is just full of interesting dates!

Today is the National Day of Prayer, so say a few for all of those people and intentions that are needed.

It is also National Nurses Day so a big thanks to all who chose that profession, especially those among our classmates!

Jim 

Michael McLeod

Plus another particularly big full moon and a lunar eclipse in a couple of weeks to count among this month's offerings.

By the way, Joe: I'm going to use that church bulletin material in my writing class. So thanks.

Mary Margaret Clark (Schultheis)

A former classmate who is not in this forum posted this on Facebook. It is how I feel, but as an "old lady" and the author expresses his feelings so much more eloquently than I could do.

"I asked an elderly man once what it was like to be old and to know the majority of his life was behind him. He told me that he has been the same age his entire life. He said the voice inside of his head had never aged. He has always just been the same boy. His mother's son. He had always wondered when he would grow up and be an old man. He said he watched his body age and his faculties dull but the person he is inside never got tired. Never aged. Never changed.
Our spirits are eternal. Our souls are forever. The next time you encounter an elderly person, look at them and know they are still a child, just as you are still a child and children will always need love, attention and purpose. Author unknown 

Joseph D. McCarthy

Well I gave everyone a warning.  So Mike here are the (last) remaining Church Ladies Bulletin Items.

  1.  Eight new choir robes are currently needed due to the addition of several new members and to the deterioration of some older ones.

  2.  Please place your donation in the envelope along with the deceased person you want remembered.

  3.  The church will host an evening of fine dining, super entertainment and gracious hostility.

  4.  Pot-luck supper Sunday at 5:00 PM   -  prayer and medication to follow.

  5.  The ladies of the church have cast off clothing of every kind.  They may be seen in the basement on Friday afternoon.

  6.  This evening at 7 PM there will be a hymn singing in the park across from the church.  Bring a blanket and come prepared to sin.

  7.  The pastor would appreciate it if the ladies of the Congregation would lend him their electric girdles for the pancke breakfast next Sunday.

  8.  The Low Self Esteem Support Group will meet Thursday at 7 PM.  Please use the back door.

  9.  The eigth-graders will be presenting Shakespeare's Hamlet in the Church basement Friday at 7 PM.  The congregation is invited to attend this tragedy.

10.  Weight Watchers will meet at 7 PM at the First Presbyterian Church.  Please use the large double door at the side entrance.

And this one just about sums them all up.

11.  The Associate Minister unveiled the church's new campaign slogan last Sunday: "I Upped My Pledge - Up Yours.

Have a good and safe week.

Joe

Thomas McKeon

Great post Mary Margaret can't argue with what that person had to say.  

David Mitchell

Joe,

These are all very helpful but I didn't need this last #6.

I always make it a point to show up with a blanket and am prepared to sin.

Michael McLeod

Thanks MM.

That post reminds me of seeing Paul McCartney being asked what it was like to be famous.

And he said, essentially, that he was still, after all these years, surprised and pleased by the attention. I'll see if I can find the clip, but the way he explained it was by saying something to the effect that he still had a little boy inside who, whenever he made an appearance to speak or perform, was thinking: "No way! All these people came to see me?" 

You can see it in him. He's still a kid. We are drawn to people who still know how to play. 

Michael McLeod

Hey looks like they are getting kicked out of the arena where they are doing the Arizona recount.

Maybe Area 51 is available.