Sorry to post this just after Tom McKeon's Irish joke about losing a brother, but what the heck, here goes.
I mentioned a few months back that my younger brother, Tom (class of '74), had been diagnosed with having an inoperable brain tumor. I doubt many of you would have known him since he was eight years younger than us, but a few of you did know my family members, so I am sad to report that Tom passed away yesterday. The only slightly good news is that he managed to go through this six month ordeal without any pain, not even headaches. And when his body finally took a sharp turn for the worse, it only lasted a few days. So given how horrific cancer related illnesses can be, knowing that he did not suffer is a blessing.
Mark, I am deeply sorry for the loss of your brother, Tommy. It is hard to lose a sibling. It's like losing a large piece of your heart. It's most difficult at this time with so much restriction of our movements. It has to be frustrating to not be able to share the comforting with your family. It makes it especially sad. My best to you and Maddie at this moment most difficult. To Tommy, and his courageous fight.
Thanks to everyone for the condolences. On a happier note, here is a fond memory of Tom from several years back. I wrote this for a party given by The Camera House in honor of Tom’s 50th birthday. Notes – these are for those not familiar with Tom’s job being a manger in a professional camera rental facility. They should help with understanding some of the references and inside jokes in the song:
1) The Camera House -- the company where Tom worked as one of the rental managers.
2) Aside from making sure all of the equipment needed for a job was available for upcoming rental contracts, and supervising those working under him, his job also entailed making deals with prospective clients and listening to their hard luck stories about having no budget to create their works of art. And of course there was also the need to deal with them on the return when they feigned having no knowledge of equipment being returned damaged. “Tom, I swear it never left the box.”
3) Camera assistants, who will be working with the equipment on the job, inspect everything before it leaves the building. They invariably ask for back-ups of certain items that, in their opinion, can prove unreliable on the set like the “microforce” controller for a zoom lens. Therefore they might request, not only a back-up, but a back-up to the back-up.
4} Rufus Burnham -- owner of the camera house. Todd and Dominique -- co-workers.
5) Rufus liked to think of his company as being a high-end boutique establishment, hence the term used here, “camera-chic.”
6) Rental operations were often thrown into disarray when customers failed to return the gear, as scheduled, in time for it to be turned around for another order, or when technical staff failed to come to work to inspect and service the equipment before it could be sent it out again.
This song is a parody of the Gilbert and Sullivan patter-song from The Pirates of Penzance called The Modern Major General, and therefore needs to be delivered in a very fast tempo. However, you may notice near the end, there is a short break from the rhythm of Modern Major General, and instead I copied an exchange from Gilbert and Sullivan’s HMS Pintafore, where we are told the Captain is “Never, ever sick at sea,” and the chorus responds, “What never.” “No never,” “What never,” ending with “He’s hardly ever sick at sea.” And yes, I know that it is a bit of a stretch to rhyme New Orleans with Napoleon, but it works if it is pronounced the way it is pronounced in French – “Orleeon”
Mark, I am so sorry for your loss. We lose a big part of ourselves when we lose a sibling but so much of them stays with us to help us get through it. What a great song you wrote for Tom on his 50th. He had to love it. The memories live on.
Mark, what a wonderful way to celebrate your brother on his special birthday! Thanks for sharing, as it gave us all a window into the kind of guy Tom was. Loyal and dedicated employees such as your song refers to, attest to Tom's affable character. And his own personal willingness to go to extraordinary means to keep Camera House customers happy, provided an exemplary model for those employees to follow. May that affection and loyalty await him at the pearly gates as he rests in peace..
In less than 1 hour a unique ceremony will begin at thr Air Force Academy. About 970 senior cadets will graduate earlier than usual due to the pandemic. VP Pence will give the commencement address to be held, not in the football stadium in front of a large crowd, but on the massive terrazzo next to the chapel with no spectators. The Thunderbirds will make but one pass as the cadre stands in their blue tunic, white trouser uniforms with special dress masks separated from from each other by eight feet. There will be no handing out of individual diplomas, no high fives, chest bumps or hugs.
It is a beautiful, blue sky, sunny day here in Colorado Springs. Many residents have put out their flags - as have we - in support of the graduates.
The California legislature could use a mass influx of Editors, or people of commmon snse - instead of lawyers and lobbyists. When the Covid-19 pandemic got going (noticed) in California they pass a bill closing businesses, EXCEPT essential ones. One of the exceptions was to ensure that Law Enforcement could obtain weapons and ammunition as needed. Lobbist ran a bulldozer through that exception that kept gun shops open for ALL. Yet there were no exceptions for critical businesses like hair salons and barber shops.
Here in WA a few gun shops decided to just ignore the Gov's order to close non-essential businesses. Apparently, there is an overwhelming fear of herds of deer and elk rampaging through homes. This is coupled with Zombies roaming the landscape. Well, you can understand people needing more guns with big, really big magazines. And hell, that doesn't even address the very real threat of Zombie Deer!
On the bright side, the weight of public opinion has forced the removal of an Indian maid from the Land O Lakes butter packages. Celebrations have broken out on reservations across our land. It is time for the next step. Our efforts at perfecting 'Murican culture scream for the color red to be banned from public advertising! We all know how terrible red is, how it defines anger or menace or fear. We need to stand together and ban red....from...well, everything! We'll address the issue of the stripes in the 'Murican flag in another installment.
Sounds almost eerie Jim, but somewhat inspirational in it's own way.
My first vist to the Acadamy was freshman year at University of Denver and I rented a car and drove down to see Tom McKeon for the day.
Only other time was years later - got asked to go with friends to a Falcons footbal game. Only thing I rememeber was that during the half time show with the trained Falcons, the bird took off and did not return.
Go "Zoomies"
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Hey Joe, and Tim,
How about this?
Since we declared ammo clips to be as essential as cheeseburgers, we could save everybody time by letting McDonalds and Wendy's take orders for bullets as well as hamburgers.
"That'll be two Big Macs, two fries, two large cokes - and did you want hollow points with that."
No, maybe not. There's the risk of "drive-thru rage" and that could get messy. You couldn't tell the blood from the catsup.
But we could make it availalble only to law enforcemnt officers and that way Dunkin' Donuts could handle it.
Joe, Pony tails: If you have a shop vac, put a rubber band (from a stalk of celery) on the end of the hose or wand. Position the hose or wand at the nape of the neck, around where you think the medula oblongata might be located. Turn on the vacuum, suck all the hair into hose or wand, roll the rubber band off the tube onto the hair. Turn off the vac. Voila. Don't forget to winnie as you put away your styling equipment.
The question should be, How many of us let our stomachs grow out after leaving the service?
Which leads to to another question that has puzzled me all my life. Why is it that all Harley riders have long white beards, and huge stomachs? Is it a "Santa Complex" thing, or some sort of requirement for ownership? If so, I will soon meet the requirement.
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